Forbidden
by I.S.W.A.S
Summary: Set mid way though Series 4. Merlin seeks any way to rid him of his destiny,yet sometimes the only route to what you want, is the one you never thought you'd take.
1. Chapter 1

_**Chapter One**_

_**Remembrance **_

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_M_erlin straightened up slightly as he began to regain consciousness, a foul smell of rotted vegetation coursing though his head and clinging to it much like dehydration seemed to after his rare nights at the tavern. His eyes we're fully open now yet Merlin could sill barely see a thing, the little light that entered the small damp room he had been tied up in only served to dance in small spots on the floor before him.

"I trust you slept well." Morgana's voice rose as if to taunt as her hand gently slid over the back of Merlin's tunic, dipping slightly at his spine in order to send a shiver though Merlin's very being, oh how she loved to put an enemy on edge. Her feet danced over the uneven floor until she stood facing Merlin where her eyes met with his, unmoving and harsh to her surprise as he stiffened up slightly, his hands still attached to the ceiling making his height still lower than that of Morgana.

"What do you want with me?" Merlin asked, afraid of the small quake he had heard in his voice letting out fear he tried to be as distant as possible to her. A smile played on Morgana's lips, Merlin made her impatient and although he had not always been this way Morgana could not let her mind remember how Merlin used to be, how she used to find him insightful, witty and clever and how had her so-called father been more lenient she would have been his gladly. No, Morgana's mind could not dwell on these matters.

Her smile faded in to a devious grin, "Want? The true question Merlin is as to what I desire. And that you know all too well as you alone seem to thwart my plans more than any other." He could hear the anger in her voice rising, of course there was no doubt in his mind that this was about Arthur, it was always about Arthur. Merlin let out a small sigh, why couldn't Morgana stay as she had been, a creature of nobility and beauty, or course her beauty had remained one of her prominent features, yet now it was masked by a veil of impure deeds and desires.

Perhaps...no, Merlin's thoughts were stupid; there was no way for Morgana to turn back, no way for him to change either of their destinies, not now and not ever! No this wasn't even worth a try, of course once Morgana had been as sweet and fragrant as a freshly picked flower but now that flower had wilted and shriveled in to merely a cast of its former self. And though all of this was true, Merlin still found himself willing the possibility forward.

"Morgana," He began a lump rising in his throat as her piercing eyes turned upon him, "Do you remember how things used to be?"


	2. Chapter 2

_**"Morgana," He began a lump rising in his throat as her piercing eyes turned upon him, "Do you remember how things used to be?"**_

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_**Chapter 2**_

_**Lovers Flame**_

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_S_he felt her eyes widen slightly at his words, surely his mind had not been lingering on the same thoughts as her own. No, that was impossible yet still it had caused Morgana to reminisce upon her days in Camelot, a time when Arthur was a possible suitor, Merlin and Gwen friends that she had turned in to enemies all sprung from her father's hatred for those with magic. No one understood how she felt, she had lost that privilege along with Morgause, and she could not even find refuge with the druids now.

Her anger turned to Merlin now; she could not afford to be vulnerable which was all his words seemed to do to her no matter how they had been intended. She made one stride towards him, and gripping his shoulder in her hands, once feeble yet now shaking with rage she pulled his body downwards, his own weight causing her arms to nearly buckle as his head rose to meet hers. "The past has no relevance now Merlin, surely you can see that. I was under my father's illusion, this now is who I am."

Merlin could not fathom how Morgana could forsake the past, it was after all what made her who she was, this terrifying creature standing over him, her eyes boring in to the back of his skull, her grasp so strong on his shoulder that he could not rise no matter how much strength he forced from himself. "Well you were not the only one under an illusion." Merlin almost whispered, a longing tone to his words made Morgana immediately loosen her grip upon him, yet he did not rise. What did he mean, he was under an illusion?

"How could you have possibly been under an illusion Merlin?" Her voice came out harsher that it was intended, causing Merlin's head to stoop a little lower. He let out no sigh this time, instead he turned his face towards her with an almost pitiful look etched upon it.

"I thought you cared, I thought you had cared about Camelot, Arthur and in particular Gwen..." His voice trialed slightly as he once again looked to the floor, "I thought you cared about me."

Before Morgana could stop herself she had her lips firmly pressed against his, it overcoming her much like a flame.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Before Morgana could stop herself she had her lips firmly pressed against his, it overcoming her much like a flame.**_

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_**Chapter 3**_

_**Prohibited **_

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Merlin fell backwards slightly, had he his hands to use even he was not sure if he would push Morgana away of pull her closer. She placed a hand on the back of his head, entwining her fingers with his hair as she slowly felt him begin to kiss her back, as if he too was giving in to a fire that burned deep within him. Her hand gently slid up the inside of his tunic to rest upon his chest as he took a tentative step towards her, Morgana's mind began to wander before she quickly broke from his kiss, "Aliese." she uttered, breaking the lock that held Merlin in place and freeing his arms.

He immediately stood upright once more, his head a mere inch from the ceiling of the small hideout that he had been taken to, now aware of Morgana's true feelings for him, Merlin forced her backwards on to the wall behind her before kissing her again, this time deeper and more passionately as his arms pulled her further in to the kiss by her waist. His face had now faded from it's original crimson color when Morgana had first pressed her lips to his, she now just left the young warlock eager for more.

Morgana was the first to open her mouth, she gently traced the outline of Merlin's lips with her tongue encouraging him to open them, he obeyed although the time he took to do so clearly showed to her just how nervous Merlin was about taking anything at to great of a speed. Merlin had released Morgana's waist by this point and was pinning her to the wall with just his own body, his hands either side of her, pressed firmly against the wall to support most of his weight as to not hurt Morgana.

Morgana had now lost all off her once renowned patience and again decided to fuel their kiss with more passion than it needed, this time slipping her tongue in to Merlin's mouth to dance with and tease his. However rational thought was returning to Merlin's mind and although so much of him longed for this show of passion and longing that Morgana was giving to him never to cease he succumbed to rationality before he became hers all together. Merlin broke this kiss abruptly, as if he was breaking for air and so when Morgana once again thrust herself upon him it shocked her that he had stepped backwards slightly.

"Morgana, this is wrong." Merlin whispered, now feeling that he had yet another secret to burden.


	4. Chapter 4

_**"Morgana, this is wrong." Merlin whispered, now feeling that he had yet another secret to burden.  
**_

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_**Chapter 4  
**_

_**Destiny's Turn  
**_

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_S_he fell back slightly at his words, how could something so wrong feel so profoundly sweet as to satisfy a beggar with the feast of the king, no his words were that of a mere fool. Yet despite her best efforts Morgana found herself agreeing with the young warlock, in what way she was not sure, however at the same time, she longed to see more of Merlin, now that she had him at last she could not be expected to let him go, surely? Morgana straightened up and smoothed out the folds that had appeared in her dress, "So we just forget about this, return to normal?" she questioned gesturing to Merlin who's red marks around his wrists had since faded to a rosy pink, rather like that of his blush.

Merlin's hand habitually rose to the back of his head where he pulled at the lowest strand of hair there present, it was what he had always done when thinking. "If you wish, I did have an idea of how we could make this work though..." Merlin trailed off, thinking Morgana may just wish to forget him entirely, go back to how they were, like he had said, this was wrong.

Morgana gestured for Merlin to continue in his plan making him snap forward to whisper although no one else would here even if he shouted, much like he had when he was a child, "we can meet here, in secret." Merlin leaned back slightly, proud that he had been able to forge such an idea in his head, the only trouble was how to do it, and how to convince Arthur in particular, perhaps he could pretend to sneak away herbs, if he could convince Morgana to ease her war on him perhaps their meetings could even be somewhat frequent.

Merlin's train of thought was interrupted by Morgana's words, "No, far to risky you would be suspected and I'm sure found out, despite most things my brother does at least have some form of brain. No, we have to get much better than that." Merlin sighed slightly, what could be done, of course if he could he would forget this in an instant, if only things were so easy. Morgana's mind followed the same train of thought, it was hardly as if she could disappear.

Morgana smiled slightly removing a delicate jeweled bracelet from her wrist and holding it up to the light "Gewyrc an lif." she uttered causing an exact replica to reside in her other hand. Morgana slid her won bracelet back on to her wrist before handing the other to Merlin.

"What's this in aid of?" Merlin asked gently turning it over in his hands and admiring how the emeralds and rubies danced in the little light that could reach them both.

"Is is an exact replica of Morgause's healing bracelet, it was all I could salvage from her body naturally it has no effect upon me other than to serve as a reminder of her." Merlin's face was still as confused as ever, it was unusual for him to be this slow Morgana thought, yet this was something she always held close to herself. "Arthur knows I would never be without this." Merlin suddenly caught on to what Morgana was suggesting they do, he shook his head, this was stupid and destined to fail, they'd both die in the process.

Morgana smiled taking his head in her hands and placing a light kiss upon his lips, "We have to Merlin, Arthur has to think I'm dead."


End file.
